A debate about honesty

[Dean Leysen]

Honest communication is a very simple concept: you say something truthful to another person, the other person receives truthful information from you, and you're communicating honestly (I know, this is deep, wait for it.)

What's interesting is that when people talk about honesty, they rarely seem to take into account the other person's interpretation. If you say A and another person hears B, your intention and even the content of what you said may have been honest, but the communication wasn't.
For example, you could point out a flaw in a friend of yours with the intention of helping him/her in overcoming it and they might perceive what you said as a personal attack or an insult, a way of degrading or humiliating him/her. You say A, they hear B. You honestly wanted to help, they think you're being malicious. This is just one example of how honesty can be misinterpreted, but you get the point.

So what's your view on honesty? Do you find there is value in being honest to people even if you know their interpretation will be different? When do you think honesty is invaluable, and when is it impractical or even useless? Let loose your thoughts, I Power Rangers!

[Muhammed Gouda]

Honesty is a great Virtue that can get a person in trouble really i know a guy who is too honest to the extent that he is misunderstood a lot he actually told a girl once if you stop being such a slut you'll find people treat you better since then she hasn't really talked to him she didn't understand that he had a good intention

that story above shows that honesty is useless when it's presented in a rude way

pointing out someone's flaws should be done in a non rude way and without anybody else noticing

[Ryan]

Honesty is one of the greatest traits to have. In the instance of your example, if the person wasn't honest with their friend they would not have given their friend the oppurtunity to self-develop. If you say everything is okay there really isn't a reason to change. As Muhammed said, I'd give the advice in a careful manner so that my intentions are not being interrupted incorrectly by the person. In the end it's realistically unavoidable; the truth hurts when other individuals are pointing it out for you.

I can't think of any instances where withholding honesty can be justified unless one is preventing another from doing something reckless.

[Paladin]

yes

[vic]

agreed!

[Trosso]

best to be brutally honest, even when it hurts.

[Muhammed Gouda]

but if your brutally honest he/she won't listen to you

[Paladin]

If they choose not to listen they wont hear you if you are honest or not.

[spd.szabi]

your "honest" thoughts might be unrealistic be aware how your thoughts are in sync with reality

[Paladin]

honesty implies truth which is the foundation of reality.

[Garrett Fuls]

"honesty implies truth"

Honesty, at least in a conversational situation, is the communication of your true interpretation of reality. Is this what you meant? It's hard to tell when you make such brief statements.

Honesty does not imply any universal truth. Only that you are truthfully representing your interpretation, which as szabi said, may not be in sync with reality.

[Paladin]

I said honesty implies truth, not proves truth. Ignorance is another subject.

[Andrew]

Honesty is great. If I have learned anything in life, it's that being honest tends to make life go so much more smoothly. Usually when people try to hide something and are found out, everything seems to backfire and make the situation worse than it would have been if they were just honest in the first place (bad past experience haha). Now, for being honest when someone asks you something about themselves, I think it's best to just be honest and say how you really feel. It just takes a little bit of thinking and planning out your words before you say what you think so that you don't come off sounding as rude. All in all, I think everybody should try to be as honest as possible (something I'm still working on).